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Tips for Staying Focused When You Have ADHD: A Guide for Teens

Introduction

If you’re a teen with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), you might struggle with focusing on schoolwork, completing assignments, or staying attentive in class. ADHD can impact your ability to organize, manage time, and concentrate. But the good news is there are specific strategies you can use to help improve focus. In this guide, we’ll explore some tips and techniques that can help you succeed academically and personally, all supported by research.

1. Break Tasks into Smaller Steps

ADHD can make large tasks feel overwhelming, leading to procrastination or anxiety. Research suggests that breaking tasks into smaller, manageable steps can help make tasks feel more achievable and less intimidating (Barkley, 2015). For example, instead of trying to complete an entire project in one sitting, focus on completing just one part at a time.

Tip: Create a checklist of small tasks related to a big assignment. Checking off each step can give you a sense of progress and accomplishment.

2. Use a Timer for Focused Work Sessions

A technique called the Pomodoro Method can help increase focus by breaking study time into intervals (Cirillo, 2006). Set a timer for 25 minutes and work on a task until the timer goes off. Then, take a 5-minute break before starting the next session. This technique helps build a habit of staying focused in shorter bursts, which is easier to manage with ADHD.

Tip: Use a kitchen timer or a timer app on your phone to help stick to the intervals. Remember to reward yourself with a break after each work session!

3. Minimize Distractions in Your Study Environment

ADHD makes it challenging to ignore distractions, so it’s essential to create a study space with minimal distractions. Studies show that a quiet, organized environment can improve concentration for people with ADHD (Tuckman, Abry, & Smith, 2002). This means turning off your phone notifications, keeping only necessary items on your desk, and, if possible, studying in a quiet place.

Tip: If you find it hard to stay off your phone, consider using apps like Forest or Focus@Will, which are designed to help you focus by blocking distractions.

4. Set Realistic Goals and Prioritize Tasks

ADHD can make it tough to prioritize, so setting clear, realistic goals can help keep you on track. Studies suggest that prioritizing tasks can help reduce stress and improve time management skills for those with ADHD (Brown, 2013). Each day, make a to-do list and identify your top priorities. This will help you tackle the most important tasks first.

Tip: Use planners or digital tools like Google Keep or Trello to organize your tasks and track your progress.

5. Practice Mindfulness Techniques

Mindfulness can help improve focus and reduce impulsivity, which can be especially helpful for teens with ADHD (Zylowska et al., 2008). Mindfulness involves paying attention to the present moment without judgment. Practicing simple mindfulness exercises, such as deep breathing or short meditation sessions, can help you feel more centered and focused.

Tip: Try practicing deep breathing exercises before starting your homework or during study breaks to help clear your mind and refocus.

6. Take Regular Physical Activity Breaks

Physical activity has been shown to improve focus and cognitive function in individuals with ADHD (Medina et al., 2010). Exercise can help increase dopamine levels in the brain, which play a role in attention and focus. Taking short, active breaks, such as a walk or a quick workout, can help recharge your brain and prepare you for focused work.

Tip: When you start feeling restless or unfocused, take a five-minute walk or do some stretching to reset your energy.

7. Get Enough Sleep

Sleep plays a critical role in concentration and focus, especially for people with ADHD. Studies show that teens with ADHD often have disrupted sleep patterns, which can worsen symptoms (Owens, 2005). Aim for at least 8-9 hours of sleep each night to help you feel more alert and ready to focus.

Tip: Establish a consistent bedtime routine, avoid screens an hour before bed, and keep your bedroom as dark and quiet as possible to improve sleep quality.

8. Reward Yourself for Completing Tasks

Rewards can help motivate you to stay focused. Studies show that reward-based systems are effective for managing ADHD symptoms (Pelham et al., 2017). You can set up a reward system for yourself by choosing something you enjoy as a “treat” after you finish a task.

Tip: For example, after completing your homework, reward yourself with a favorite snack or time on your favorite video game.

Conclusion

Staying focused with ADHD can be challenging, but using these strategies can help you improve your focus and manage your time better. Remember, it’s okay to take small steps and make adjustments as you go. With practice, patience, and support, you can succeed both in school and in personal goals.

This article has been written by John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW. Mr. Collier has over 25 years experience in the Social Work field. He may be reached at 6066570532 ext 101 or by email at [email protected].

References

• Barkley, R. A. (2015). Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder: A handbook for diagnosis and treatment. Guilford Publications.

• Brown, T. E. (2013). A new understanding of ADHD in children and adults: Executive function impairments. Routledge.

• Cirillo, F. (2006). The Pomodoro Technique. FC Garage.

• Medina, J. A., Netto, T. L., Muszkat, M., & Batistela, M. E. (2010). Exercise impact on sustained attention of ADHD children. Health, 2(11), 1244-1250.

• Owens, J. A. (2005). The ADHD and sleep conundrum: A review. Journal of Developmental & Behavioral Pediatrics, 26(4), 312-322.

• Pelham, W. E., Fabiano, G. A., & Massetti, G. M. (2017). Evidence-based psychosocial treatments for attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. Journal of Clinical Child & Adolescent Psychology, 34(3), 449-476.

• Tuckman, B. W., Abry, D. A., & Smith, D. R. (2002). Learning and motivation strategies for students with ADHD. Journal of Learning Disabilities, 35(4), 321-333.

• Zylowska, L., Ackerman, D. L., Yang, M. H., Futrell, J. L., Horton, N. L., Hale, T. S., & Smalley, S. L. (2008). Mindfulness meditation training in adults and adolescents with ADHD: A feasibility study. Journal of Attention Disorders, 11(6), 737-746.

Each of these strategies can be helpful on its own, but combining them may provide the most benefit. Give yourself grace as you try these new approaches, and keep experimenting to find what works best for you.

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Why Do I Always Tell My Children “No”: Understanding and Shifting the Habit

As a parent, you want the best for your children. But you may have noticed yourself often saying “No” automatically, even when it comes to requests that might be harmless. This habit is common among parents and often rooted in various psychological and situational factors. Understanding why we respond this way can help us build a more balanced approach to parenting, one that encourages open communication, nurtures independence, and helps children feel heard and respected.

 1. The “No” Habit and Parenting Stress

Saying “No” frequently can become an unconscious habit. With the demands of work, household responsibilities, and parenting, parents often operate on “auto-pilot” (Harris, 2009). “No” may seem like the easiest response because it quickly resolves the request, keeping daily tasks from being interrupted. However, constantly saying “No” can lead to a tense relationship with your child and make them feel their needs aren’t valued.

 Why This Happens

Stress and fatigue are significant factors here. When parents are overwhelmed, they tend to take shortcuts, often opting for immediate control over open discussions (APA, 2020). Unfortunately, this response can create a cycle where children either learn to stop asking or begin to push back, escalating power struggles.

 What You Can Do

Recognize when stress is affecting your interactions with your children. Taking a few deep breaths or a moment to think before responding can help you evaluate whether the “No” is necessary. Reflecting on why you’re saying “No” can help break the habit and introduce more flexibility in your responses.

 2. The Desire to Protect

One of the main reasons parents instinctively say “No” is the need to protect their children from potential harm, failure, or disappointment. Psychologically, this is known as “protective parenting,” a natural inclination that stems from love and a desire to keep children safe (Siegel & Bryson, 2012). But, when used too often, it can limit children’s opportunities to explore and grow.

 Why This Happens

The need to shield children from harm is deeply ingrained in parents, especially when it comes to risky situations. However, saying “No” to low-risk situations, like letting kids experiment with small tasks, can prevent them from developing resilience and confidence.

 What You Can Do

When your child asks for something, take a moment to consider if there’s a real risk. If it’s safe, try saying “Yes” or providing a compromise. For instance, instead of saying “No, you can’t go out in the rain,” you might say, “Yes, but let’s put on a raincoat and boots first.” Allowing children to safely navigate challenges can build their confidence and independence (Dweck, 2006).

 3. The Need for Control and Consistency

Parents often feel that frequent “No’s” maintain consistency and reinforce boundaries. While setting boundaries is crucial, constantly saying “No” can sometimes be less about discipline and more about maintaining a sense of control during chaotic moments (Gottman & DeClaire, 1998). This may unintentionally communicate rigidity rather than guidance.

 Why This Happens

Establishing order feels essential when parents have many responsibilities. However, too many “No’s” can restrict children’s ability to express themselves and explore their environment, which are important aspects of childhood development (Ginsburg, 2007).

What You Can Do

Try establishing a few firm boundaries while allowing flexibility in less critical areas. For instance, if your child wants to play before finishing their homework, consider a time-limited break rather than a strict “No.” Offering choices within boundaries helps children feel a sense of control and teaches decision-making skills.

 4. The Negativity Bias and Past Experiences

Parents’ own childhood experiences and memories can shape their instinctual reactions. If you grew up in a strict environment, you might find yourself unconsciously repeating similar patterns. Additionally, the human brain has a “negativity bias,” which means we naturally focus more on potential negative outcomes (Goleman, 2006). This bias can make it easier to focus on why something is a bad idea instead of the potential positives.

Why This Happens

Experiences from your own childhood can subconsciously shape how you react. For instance, if you were often told “No,” you may find yourself doing the same with your children, without fully realizing why.

What You Can Do

Reflect on how your own experiences may be influencing your parenting style. Are there situations where you can be more open? Journaling or talking with a counselor can help you become more aware of these patterns and make conscious choices to encourage a positive environment.

 5. The Desire for Predictability

Saying “No” often gives parents a feeling of predictability and control. Children can be unpredictable, and setting strict boundaries can feel like a way to keep things manageable. However, children’s development thrives in environments where they feel safe to explore, make choices, and occasionally make mistakes (Montessori, 2013).

 Why This Happens

When schedules are tight and parents are balancing many responsibilities, controlling the environment by saying “No” can feel like a quick fix. Unfortunately, this can also stifle curiosity and experimentation.

 What You Can Do

Embrace moments of “controlled unpredictability.” For instance, if your child wants to play with something messy like paint, plan it for a specific time when you can manage it. Being flexible helps children feel more comfortable trying new things and builds trust in the parent-child relationship.

 6. Building a More Balanced Approach: When to Say “Yes”

It’s important to remember that not every “Yes” has to be a big decision. Small “Yeses” can empower your child and strengthen your bond. Saying “Yes” doesn’t mean a lack of boundaries—it means choosing which requests to support and which to discuss more.

 What You Can Do

Start by saying “Yes” to safe, reasonable requests whenever possible. If something doesn’t work out perfectly, use it as a learning experience. This shift toward a more balanced approach can help your child feel heard, build trust, and even encourage more positive behavior.

Moving Away from “No” for a Healthier Connection

Saying “No” is sometimes necessary, but it doesn’t have to be the automatic response. By understanding why you might be inclined to say “No” and practicing a more flexible approach, you can encourage a more supportive, open relationship with your child. Remember, balanced guidance, mixed with the freedom to explore, is a powerful combination that can help your child grow with confidence and curiosity.

This article has been written by John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW. Mr. Collier has over 25 years of experience in the social work field and is based in London Kentucky through Southeast Kentucky Behavioral Health, LLC. Mr. Collier may be reached by phone at (606) 657–0532 extension 101 or by email at [email protected].

 References

  • American Psychological Association. (2020). Parenting in the Time of COVID-19. APA.
  • Dweck, C. S. (2006). Mindset: The New Psychology of Success. Random House.
  • Ginsburg, K. R. (2007). The Importance of Play in Promoting Healthy Child Development and Maintaining Strong Parent-Child Bonds. Pediatrics, 119(1), 182-191.
  • Goleman, D. (2006). Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships. Bantam.
  • Gottman, J., & DeClaire, J. (1998). Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child. Simon & Schuster.
  • Harris, P. (2009). Parenting Without Stress: How to Raise Responsible Kids While Keeping a Life of Your Own. PuddleDancer Press.
  • Montessori, M. (2013). The Absorbent Mind. Start Publishing LLC.
  • Siegel, D. J., & Bryson, T. P. (2012). The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind. Bantam.
Why Do We Feel Guilty When We Take the Time to Relax?

In today’s fast-paced world, feelings of guilt often accompany moments of rest and relaxation. Many individuals experience anxiety and guilt when taking time for themselves, feeling as if they are neglecting responsibilities or failing to meet societal expectations of productivity. This article explores psychological, cultural, and societal reasons behind the guilt associated with relaxation and offers insights into how individuals can overcome this guilt to achieve a healthier work-life balance.

 The Psychological Basis of Guilt

Guilt, as a psychological experience, can be described as a negative emotional state that arises when one perceives that they have done something wrong or violated personal values. Research suggests that guilt often stems from deeply embedded societal and cultural norms, as well as from internalized expectations about productivity and self-worth (Tangney et al., 2007).

For instance, cognitive theories suggest that individuals may develop “should” statements, such as “I should be working,” which create a sense of duty to be constantly productive (Beck, 1976). This cognitive distortion leads to an emotional response that equates rest with irresponsibility or laziness, thus inducing guilt.

 Cultural and Societal Pressures

Cultural norms around productivity significantly contribute to feelings of guilt. In many cultures, particularly those with strong individualistic values, productivity is often equated with personal value (Hofstede, 1984). In these settings, people may feel that their self-worth is directly tied to their achievements, making it challenging to relax without feeling as though they are compromising their personal value.

Furthermore, the “hustle culture” promoted on social media often glorifies overworking and presents relaxation as a luxury for the unmotivated (Shapiro, 2019). This societal influence can lead people to internalize the belief that downtime is wasted time, thereby increasing the guilt associated with it.

The Role of Personal Values and Work Ethic

For many individuals, personal values and work ethic play a role in the experience of guilt during relaxation. Those who value hard work and efficiency may find it difficult to allow themselves time off without feeling that they are violating their core values (Grant, 2013). This guilt may be especially prominent in individuals with a strong sense of duty or responsibility toward others, such as parents, caregivers, or people in helping professions (Gould & Buss, 2015).

Coping Strategies

Overcoming guilt associated with relaxation requires reframing beliefs around productivity and self-care. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) techniques, for instance, can help individuals challenge irrational thoughts around relaxation and redefine it as a necessary component of overall well-being (Beck, 2011). Mindfulness practices also encourage people to stay present in the moment, allowing them to focus on relaxation without ruminating over undone tasks (Kabat-Zinn, 1990).

In addition, developing a structured schedule that includes dedicated time for rest can reduce feelings of guilt. Viewing relaxation as part of a balanced routine, rather than as a diversion from productivity, can help normalize it as a beneficial practice (Levine, 2000).

Feeling guilty about taking time to relax is a common experience that stems from psychological, cultural, and personal factors. Understanding the origins of this guilt and practicing techniques to reframe one’s mindset can help individuals find greater balance. Recognizing that relaxation is essential for well-being, rather than an indulgence, is a vital step in fostering a healthier relationship with oneself.

This article has been written by John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW. Mr. Collier has over 25 years of experience in the social work field. Mr. Collier currently serves as the Executive Director/President and Outpatient service provider through Southeast Kentucky Behavioral Health, LLC. Mr. Collier may be reached by phone at (606) 657–0532 extension 101 or by email at [email protected].

References

  • Beck, A. T. (1976). Cognitive Therapy and the Emotional Disorders. International Universities Press.
  • Beck, A. T. (2011). Cognitive Behavior Therapy: Basics and Beyond. Guilford Press.
  • Gould, L., & Buss, D. M. (2015). The Psychology of Moral Emotions. Academic Press.
  • Grant, A. M. (2013). Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success. Penguin Books.
  • Hofstede, G. (1984). Culture’s Consequences: International Differences in Work-Related Values. Sage.
  • Kabat-Zinn, J. (1990). Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness. Bantam.
  • Levine, R. (2000). A Geography of Time: The Temporal Misadventures of a Social Psychologist. Basic Books.
  • Shapiro, J. (2019). The paradox of hustle culture: How working nonstop became a status symbol. Journal of Media Psychology, 12(3), 210-217.
  • Tangney, J. P., Stuewig, J., & Mashek, D. J. (2007). Moral emotions and moral behavior. Annual Review of Psychology, 58, 345-372.