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Everyday Ways to Improve Aphasia

What is Aphasia?

Aphasia is a condition that makes it hard for people to speak, understand words, read, or write. It usually happens after a stroke or brain injury. Some people with aphasia have trouble finding the right words, while others may not understand what is being said to them. Even though aphasia can be frustrating, there are many ways to improve communication every day.

1. Practice Speaking Every Day

Using words as much as possible can help the brain heal and improve speech. Studies show that people who practice speaking often get better over time (Brady et al., 2016). Here are some simple ways to practice:

  • Read Out Loud: Reading books, newspapers, or even food labels can help with word recall.
  • Describe Objects: Look at things around you and try to name them. For example, if you see a chair, say “chair” out loud.
  • Sing Songs: Singing can help with speech. Many people with aphasia find it easier to sing than to talk (Racette, Bard, & Peretz, 2006).

2. Use Other Ways to Communicate

Speaking is not the only way to communicate. If words are hard to find, try using:

  • Gestures: Pointing, nodding, or using hand signs can help express thoughts.
  • Writing or Drawing: Writing words or drawing pictures can help show what you mean.
  • Apps or Picture Boards: Some people use pictures or apps on a tablet or phone to communicate (Kearns et al., 2019).

3. Take Your Time and Stay Calm

It’s important to stay relaxed when trying to talk. Rushing can make it harder to find the right words. Here are some helpful tips:

  • Pause and Breathe: If words don’t come right away, take a deep breath and try again.
  • Use Short Sentences: Speaking in short phrases can make talking easier.
  • Ask for Help: If a word is hard to remember, ask someone to help by giving hints.

4. Play Word Games and Puzzles

Games that involve words can help improve language skills. Some good options include:

  • Word Matching Games: Matching words with pictures can help with memory.
  • Crossword Puzzles: Easy crossword puzzles can help with word recall.
  • Talking with Friends and Family: Simple conversations every day help build confidence and speech skills.

5. Get Support from Others

Having support makes a big difference. Talking with family, friends, or a support group can help with communication. Studies show that people with aphasia who have support improve more than those who feel isolated (Elman & Bernstein-Ellis, 1999).

6. Work with a Speech Therapist

A speech-language pathologist (SLP) can help create a plan to improve communication. They use special exercises to help with speaking, understanding, and writing.

Conclusion

Aphasia can be challenging, but daily practice and support can help. By reading out loud, using gestures, playing word games, and staying patient, people with aphasia can improve their communication skills over time. Small steps each day can lead to big improvements!

John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW, is a seasoned clinical social worker with over 25 years of experience, serving the London, Kentucky area through Southeast Kentucky Behavioral Health, LLC. Known for his compassionate approach and commitment to quality care, Mr. Collier supports individuals and families with a focus on mental health and well-being. He is available for professional inquiries at (606) 657–0532, extension 101, or by email at [email protected].

References

Brady, M. C., Kelly, H., Godwin, J., Enderby, P., & Campbell, P. (2016). Speech and language therapy for aphasia following stroke. Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews, (6).

Elman, R. J., & Bernstein-Ellis, E. (1999). The efficacy of group communication treatment in adults with chronic aphasia. Journal of Speech, Language, and Hearing Research, 42(2), 411-419.

Kearns, K. P., Lee, J. B., & Meigh, K. M. (2019). Communication strategies for adults with aphasia. American Journal of Speech-Language Pathology, 28(3), 1136-1148.

Racette, A., Bard, C., & Peretz, I. (2006). Making non-fluent aphasics speak: Sing along! Brain, 129(10), 2571-2584.

The Best Times to Stay Silent: A Simple Guide

Sometimes, staying quiet is the best thing you can do. Knowing when to talk and when to listen can help you avoid trouble, show respect, and even help you feel calmer. This article explains the best times to stay silent and why it matters.

1. During an Argument

When people are angry, they often say things they don’t mean. Studies show that when emotions are high, people don’t think as clearly (Gross, 2002). If you stay silent, you give yourself time to calm down and think before speaking. Experts say that good relationships work better when people take a moment to reflect before responding (Gottman & Silver, 1999).

2. When Someone Else is Talking

Listening is an important skill. People who listen well build stronger relationships (Brownell, 2012). If you interrupt or talk over someone, they may feel like you don’t care about what they are saying. Staying quiet while they speak shows respect and helps you understand them better.

3. When Dealing with the Law

If you ever talk to the police, staying silent until you have a lawyer is a smart choice. In the U.S., the Fifth Amendment allows people to stay quiet so they don’t say something that could be used against them (Miranda v. Arizona, 1966). Lawyers suggest staying silent until you have legal help (Dressler, 2019).

4. When You Don’t Know the Facts

If you don’t know much about a topic, it’s better to listen and learn instead of guessing. Studies show that people who think they know everything often make mistakes (Dunning & Kruger, 1999). Staying quiet until you know the facts makes you look smarter and helps avoid spreading wrong information.

5. When You Need to Think

Silence is good for your mind. Meditation and quiet time can help reduce stress and make you feel better (Kabat-Zinn, 1994). Taking time to think and reflect can help you make better decisions and understand your feelings.

6. When Silence Can Prevent a Fight

Sometimes, saying nothing is the best way to stop a fight from getting worse. Studies show that people who stay calm and quiet can help prevent arguments from getting out of control (Bushman, 2002). This works well in school, at home, and in public places.

7. When Words Could Hurt Someone

If your words might hurt someone’s feelings, it may be better to stay quiet. When people are sad or going through a hard time, they may not need advice—they just need someone to listen (Neimeyer, 2001). Sometimes, silence is the best way to show kindness.

Silence isn’t just the absence of words—it’s a powerful way to think, listen, and stay out of trouble. Whether you’re in an argument, learning something new, or dealing with a tough situation, knowing when to stay quiet can make life better.

John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW, is a seasoned clinical social worker with over 25 years of experience, serving the London, Kentucky area through Southeast Kentucky Behavioral Health, LLC. Known for his compassionate approach and commitment to quality care, Mr. Collier supports individuals and families with a focus on mental health and well-being. He is available for professional inquiries at (606) 657–0532, extension 101, or by email at [email protected].

References

  • Brownell, J. (2012). Listening: Attitudes, Principles, and Skills (5th ed.). Pearson.
  • Bushman, B. J. (2002). “Reducing Aggression: The Benefits of Delaying Retaliatory Responses.” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 82(5), 867-877.
  • Dressler, J. (2019). Understanding Criminal Law (8th ed.). Carolina Academic Press.
  • Dunning, D., & Kruger, J. (1999). “Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties in Recognizing One’s Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-Assessments.” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 77(6), 1121-1134.
  • Gottman, J., & Silver, N. (1999). The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Three Rivers Press.
  • Gross, J. J. (2002). “Emotion Regulation: Affective, Cognitive, and Social Consequences.” Psychophysiology, 39(3), 281-291.
  • Kabat-Zinn, J. (1994). Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life. Hyperion.
  • Neimeyer, R. A. (2001). Meaning Reconstruction and the Experience of Loss. American Psychological Association.
Marriage and Happiness

Marriage is often idealized as the pinnacle of love and fulfillment—a fairy-tale ending where happiness is guaranteed. The idea that marriage is a ticket to perpetual joy, however, is a misguided notion that sets couples up for disappointment. While happiness is an important component of a healthy marriage, entering into matrimony with the sole purpose of achieving personal happiness is a fundamentally flawed premise. True marital satisfaction comes from commitment, mutual growth, and shared purpose rather than the fleeting emotion of happiness.

Happiness is Not a Constant State

One of the greatest misconceptions about marriage is that it will sustain perpetual happiness. However, research in psychology suggests that happiness is a fluctuating emotional state influenced by numerous factors, including individual well-being, life circumstances, and external stressors (Lyubomirsky, 2007). Expecting a spouse to provide continual happiness places undue pressure on the relationship, often leading to dissatisfaction when reality does not match expectations.

Studies indicate that while marriage can contribute to overall well-being, the “honeymoon phase” of heightened happiness typically fades within the first two years (Lucas et al., 2003). Once the initial excitement subsides, couples who entered marriage seeking continuous joy may feel disillusioned, mistaking normal relationship challenges as signs of incompatibility or failure.

Marriage Requires Effort, Not Just Emotion

Sustainable, long-term marriages are not built on transient feelings but on mutual effort and resilience. The work of Dr. John Gottman, a leading marriage researcher, emphasizes that successful relationships depend on factors such as emotional attunement, conflict resolution skills, and shared meaning (Gottman & Silver, 2015). Couples who focus solely on personal happiness often neglect the foundational aspects of a relationship, such as communication, compromise, and commitment.

Instead of seeing marriage as a source of happiness, couples should approach it as a partnership where both individuals strive to build a fulfilling life together. This perspective aligns with findings that marital satisfaction is linked to a shared sense of purpose and emotional support rather than just romantic bliss (Finkel et al., 2014).

Marriage is About Giving, Not Just Receiving

A marriage centered on individual happiness can quickly devolve into a transactional relationship, where each partner evaluates whether they are getting enough personal satisfaction. This mindset undermines the essence of marriage, which thrives on giving rather than just receiving. Research shows that acts of generosity and selflessness within a marriage contribute to deeper satisfaction and long-term stability (Algoe et al., 2010).

When individuals enter marriage with a self-focused mindset, they may struggle with the inevitable sacrifices and compromises that come with a shared life. True marital fulfillment arises when partners prioritize mutual growth, emotional intimacy, and a shared vision rather than individual gratification.

Happiness is a Byproduct, Not the Goal

When marriage is approached with the understanding that happiness is a byproduct of commitment rather than the primary objective, couples are more likely to build enduring relationships. Happiness in marriage stems from deep connection, shared experiences, and the ability to navigate life’s challenges together. Expecting marriage to provide happiness without effort is like expecting a garden to flourish without watering and tending to it.

Instead of asking, “Will marriage make me happy?” a more constructive question is, “Am I ready to commit, grow, and build a life with this person?” When happiness is viewed as a natural consequence of a healthy relationship rather than the sole reason for getting married, couples are better prepared for the realities of a lifelong partnership.

If the primary reason for getting married is to be happy, you may be setting yourself up for disappointment. Happiness is not a permanent state but a byproduct of commitment, mutual support, and shared purpose. A fulfilling marriage requires effort, resilience, and a willingness to grow together, rather than expecting one’s partner to be a constant source of joy. Those who enter marriage with the right mindset—one of dedication and mutual enrichment—are far more likely to experience lasting satisfaction and a deeper, more meaningful connection.

John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW, is a seasoned clinical social worker with over 25 years of experience, serving the London, Kentucky area through Southeast Kentucky Behavioral Health, LLC. Known for his compassionate approach and commitment to quality care, Mr. Collier supports individuals and families with a focus on mental health and well-being. He is available for professional inquiries at (606) 657–0532, extension 101, or by email at [email protected].

References

  • Algoe, S. B., Gable, S. L., & Maisel, N. C. (2010). It’s the Little Things: Everyday Gratitude as a Booster Shot for Romantic Relationships. Personal Relationships, 17(2), 217–233.
  • Finkel, E. J., Hui, C. M., Carswell, K. L., & Larson, G. M. (2014). The Suffocation of Marriage: Climbing Mount Maslow Without Enough Oxygen. Psychological Inquiry, 25(1), 1–41.
  • Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2015). The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Harmony Books.
  • Lucas, R. E., Clark, A. E., Georgellis, Y., & Diener, E. (2003). Reexamining Adaptation and the Set Point Model of Happiness: Reactions to Changes in Marital Status. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(3), 527–539.
  • Lyubomirsky, S. (2007). The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want. Penguin.
I Can’t stand being told “No”: How to Accept “No” as an Answer from Your Parents

Hearing “no” from your parents can be frustrating, especially when you feel like their decision is unfair or unnecessary. However, learning how to accept “no” as an answer is an important life skill that helps build self-control, patience, and resilience. Understanding why parents say “no” and developing strategies to handle it maturely can improve your relationship with them and help you navigate life’s challenges more effectively.

Why Do Parents Say “No”?

Your parents’ job is to guide and protect you, which means they sometimes have to set limits. Research shows that parental boundaries help teens develop better decision-making skills and prevent impulsive behaviors (Baumrind, 1991). Some common reasons parents say “no” include:

  • Safety Concerns – They want to protect you from harm.
  • Financial Reasons – Some requests may be too expensive.
  • Time Management – They may want you to focus on school, sleep, or family time.
  • Moral or Ethical Concerns – They may be trying to instill values in you.

While it might feel unfair in the moment, their decisions are often made with your best interests in mind.

How to Accept “No” Without Getting Upset

1. Take a Deep Breath and Stay Calm

Reacting with anger or frustration can escalate the situation. Instead, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts. Studies on emotional regulation suggest that deep breathing can help reduce stress and improve self-control (Gross, 1998).

2. Listen to Their Explanation

Rather than immediately arguing, listen to your parents’ reasoning. Even if you disagree, understanding their perspective shows maturity and respect. Research on family communication highlights that active listening improves relationships and problem-solving (Smetana, 2011).

3. Ask Questions Respectfully

If you don’t understand why they said no, ask calmly:

  • “Can you help me understand why this isn’t a good idea?”
  • “Is there a way I can prove I’m responsible enough?”

This approach shows that you respect their decision while seeking clarity.

4. Accept Their Decision Without Arguing

Sometimes, your parents’ answer won’t change no matter what. Instead of continuing to argue, acknowledge their response and move on. Constant arguing can lead to unnecessary conflict and resentment (Grusec & Goodnow, 1994).

5. Find an Alternative or Compromise

If their decision affects something important to you, try proposing a compromise. For example:

  • If they say no to going out late, suggest coming home earlier.
  • If they say no to buying something expensive, offer to contribute your own money.

Finding a middle ground can show your responsibility and willingness to cooperate.

6. Remember That “No” is Not Personal

It’s easy to feel like a “no” means your parents don’t trust or care about you, but that’s not the case. Their decisions are often based on experience and concern for your well-being. Studies show that teens who perceive parental rules as caring rather than controlling develop healthier independence (Deci & Ryan, 1985).

7. Focus on the Bigger Picture

In the moment, getting a “no” may feel like the end of the world, but ask yourself:

  • Will this still matter a week from now?
  • Is this decision really unfair, or just disappointing?

Practicing perspective-taking helps you handle setbacks in a more balanced way (Hoffman, 2000).

Accepting “no” as an answer from your parents is tough, but it’s a valuable skill that will benefit you throughout life. Learning to stay calm, listen, and respond respectfully helps build stronger relationships, develop patience, and prove your maturity. Even when you don’t agree with their decision, handling it well can lead to more trust and independence in the future.

This article has been written by John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW-S. Mr. Collier has over 25 years of experience in the Socia Work field. He currently serves as the Executive Director of Southeast Kentucky Behavioral Health, LLC based out of London Kentucky. He may be reached at (606) 657-0532 or by email at [email protected].

References

  • Baumrind, D. (1991). The influence of parenting style on adolescent competence and substance use. Journal of Early Adolescence, 11(1), 56-95.
  • Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (1985). Intrinsic motivation and self-determination in human behavior. Springer.
  • Gross, J. J. (1998). The emerging field of emotion regulation: An integrative review. Review of General Psychology, 2(3), 271-299.
  • Grusec, J. E., & Goodnow, J. J. (1994). Impact of parental discipline methods on the child’s internalization of values. Developmental Psychology, 30(1), 4-19.
  • Hoffman, M. L. (2000). Empathy and moral development: Implications for caring and justice. Cambridge University Press.
  • Smetana, J. G. (2011). Adolescents, families, and social development: How teens construct their worlds. Wiley.