Welcome to SOUTHEAST KENTUCKY BEHAVIORAL HEALTH

Archives July 2026

When Hope Hurts: The Psychology of Letting Go Without Losing Yourself

The Sudden Silence

One of the most painful aspects of losing an important relationship is not merely losing the person—it is losing the rhythm of everyday life.

Good morning messages disappear.

Conversations that once filled hours are replaced by silence.

Inside jokes become memories.

A familiar voice is suddenly absent.

The brain is remarkably adaptive to routines, especially those associated with emotional safety and reward. When a significant relationship abruptly ends, the mind continues expecting those interactions long after they have stopped. Neuroscientific research suggests that romantic attachment activates many of the same neural reward pathways involved in habit formation, making separation feel similar to withdrawal from a deeply ingrained pattern of connection. (Wiley Online Library⁠)

This is why many people report that the hardest moments are not dramatic events but ordinary ones: reaching for the phone, wanting to share good news, or instinctively wondering what the other person is doing.

The absence itself becomes emotionally loud.

⸻

The Search for Answers

Following relational loss, many individuals begin mentally reviewing every conversation, every text message, and every interaction.

“Did I miss something?”

“Was there a warning sign?”

“How could everything change so quickly?”

Psychologists refer to this repetitive thinking as rumination. Rumination differs from healthy reflection because it continually revisits the same questions without producing meaningful resolution.

The mind believes that if enough information is gathered, the pain will decrease. Unfortunately, emotional pain rarely obeys logic.

Instead, rumination often creates additional uncertainty by generating multiple possible explanations, none of which can be confirmed. Ironically, the more the individual thinks, the less certain they often become.

⸻

The Pain of Not Knowing

Perhaps the most difficult aspect of unexpected relational endings is uncertainty. People frequently assume that closure comes from receiving an explanation.

Research on ambiguous loss, however, suggests otherwise. Pauline Boss describes ambiguous loss as a form of grief characterized by uncertainty, incomplete information, and the inability to obtain definitive answers. Rather than allowing grief to progress naturally, ambiguity often keeps the grieving process active because the mind continues searching for certainty that may never arrive. (Wiley Online Library⁠)

In many relationship endings, the question is not simply, “Why did this happen?”

It becomes,

“Was any of it real?”

“Did they ever feel the same?”

“Could things still change?”

These unanswered questions often become more painful than the loss itself. Ironically, many people eventually realize that even receiving answers would not necessarily reduce their suffering. Sometimes explanations create new questions rather than peace.

⸻

Idealization and the Fantasy of Perfection

Another common psychological response involves idealization. After separation, the mind naturally emphasizes positive memories while minimizing imperfections. This process is understandable.

Healthy relationships contain meaningful experiences, and those experiences deserve to be remembered. However, emotional deprivation often magnifies those memories. Over time, the person who was loved gradually becomes transformed into the person who was hoped for.

Reality slowly gives way to imagination. One begins remembering not only who the individual actually was but who they might have become. This distinction is important. Loving someone does not require believing they were perfect.

Yet grief often creates a version of the relationship that feels almost flawless. As a result, people may find themselves grieving both the real relationship and the imagined future that will never occur.

⸻

When Words and Actions No Longer Match

One of the greatest emotional conflicts occurs when a person’s previous words seem inconsistent with their current behavior. Statements of affection become difficult to reconcile with distance. Promises seem incompatible with silence. The mind desperately attempts to force these contradictory experiences into a coherent story.

This psychological discomfort resembles what cognitive psychologists describe as cognitive dissonance—the distress experienced when two seemingly incompatible realities exist simultaneously.

The individual begins asking:

“Which version was real?”

Unfortunately, both may have been genuine. People’s feelings can change. Circumstances can shift. Fear can alter behavior. Recognizing that reality is often more complex than simple deception or simple sincerity can reduce some of the relentless self-questioning.

⸻

Hope Versus Healing

Perhaps no emotional struggle is more difficult than deciding what to do with hope. Hope itself is not unhealthy. Hope allows people to endure difficult circumstances. Hope inspires reconciliation. Hope sustains faith.

However, hope becomes problematic when life is emotionally placed on hold waiting for another person’s decision. There is a significant psychological difference between these two statements:

“If they ever reach out, I will thoughtfully decide what is best.”

versus

“My healing cannot begin until they come back.”

The first allows growth. The second postpones it. Maintaining hope while continuing to build one’s own life represents emotional resilience rather than emotional denial.

⸻

Respecting Boundaries While Grieving

One of the most loving—and painful—choices an individual may make is respecting another person’s request for distance. Choosing not to contact someone who has requested no contact requires tremendous emotional discipline. It means accepting discomfort without immediately acting to relieve it.

Psychologically, this reflects delayed gratification and emotional regulation rather than emotional indifference. Respecting boundaries does not mean feelings disappear. Instead, it demonstrates that love does not require violating another person’s expressed wishes.

⸻

Protecting the Heart Without Closing It

Many individuals eventually reach an emotional crossroads. Part of them longs for reconciliation. Another part fears experiencing the same heartbreak again. This internal conflict reflects two fundamental human needs:

* The need for connection.
* The need for safety.

Neither desire is wrong. Healthy recovery involves acknowledging both rather than allowing either one to dominate. Emotional healing is not learning never to trust again. It is learning that trust should grow alongside consistency over time.

⸻

Living With Unanswered Questions

Perhaps one of the greatest acts of emotional maturity is learning to tolerate uncertainty. Human beings naturally seek complete stories. Relationships, however, often end without complete explanations. Acceptance does not require understanding everything. Acceptance sometimes means acknowledging:

“I may never know exactly why this happened, but I can still choose how I respond.”

That choice gradually shifts emotional energy away from speculation and toward personal growth.

⸻

Conclusion

Losing someone who became woven into daily life creates far more than loneliness. It disrupts identity, routine, expectation, and hope. The resulting sadness is not evidence of weakness. It is evidence that the relationship mattered. Healing rarely occurs because every question has been answered. Healing begins when individuals gradually recognize that their peace no longer depends upon receiving those answers.

Hope may remain.

Love may remain.

Memories certainly remain.

Yet emotional freedom develops when one’s future is no longer held hostage by another person’s silence. Sometimes the strongest act of love is not chasing someone who has walked away. Sometimes it is quietly honoring their decision while continuing to become the person you were always meant to be.

⸻

References

Boss, P. (2007). Ambiguous Loss Theory: Challenges for Scholars and Practitioners. Family Relations, 56(2), 105–111. (Wiley Online Library⁠)

Boss, P. (2014). Ambiguous Loss: A Complicated Type of Grief When Loved Ones Disappear. Bereavement Care, 33(2), 63–69. (Taylor & Francis Online⁠)

Boss, P. (2016). The Context and Process of Theory Development: The Story of Ambiguous Loss. Journal of Family Theory & Review, 8(3), 269–286. (Wiley Online Library⁠)

Boss, P. (2004). Ambiguous Loss Research, Theory, and Practice: Reflections After 9/11. Journal of Marriage and Family, 66(3), 551–566. (Wiley Online Library⁠)

This article could also be expanded into a 10–15 page chapter by incorporating attachment theory (Bowlby and Ainsworth), grief models (Worden and Kübler-Ross), cognitive dissonance theory (Festinger), the neuroscience of romantic attachment (Fisher), and practical coping strategies with additional peer-reviewed citations.

Going All In: The Hidden Risks of Rushing Into a Relationship

There is something undeniably romantic about the phrase “going all in.” Movies celebrate it. Love songs glorify it. Friends often admire people who seem fearless enough to dive headfirst into love. We are told that real love requires vulnerability, commitment, and complete investment.

While commitment is essential for a healthy relationship, there is an important distinction between healthy commitment and premature emotional investment. One is built on knowledge, trust, and experience. The other is often built on hope, attraction, and assumptions.

Many relationships don’t fail because two people were incompatible. They fail because they became emotionally committed long before they truly knew one another.

The Difference Between Attraction and Knowledge

Attraction happens quickly. Knowledge takes time. During the first weeks or months of dating, we naturally see the best version of another person. Psychologists sometimes refer to this as the honeymoon phase, where the brain is flooded with dopamine, oxytocin, and other neurochemicals that create excitement, optimism, and emotional attachment (Fisher, 2004). Unfortunately, these same chemicals can reduce our ability to evaluate a relationship objectively.

When people “go all in” too quickly, they often mistake:

  • Chemistry for compatibility
  • Passion for stability
  • Attention for commitment
  • Potential for reality

Those are not the same things.

We Fall in Love With Who We Think They Are

One of the greatest dangers of rushing a relationship is that we begin filling in the blanks ourselves. Instead of learning who someone truly is, we imagine who they could become. We overlook inconsistencies. We excuse red flags.

We create explanations for behaviors we don’t fully understand. Psychologists call this idealization—seeing another person through the lens of hope rather than reality (Murray, Holmes, & Griffin, 1996). The problem is that relationships are built on reality, not imagination. Eventually, every relationship moves from fantasy to reality. When that happens, many people don’t feel like their partner changed. Instead, they finally see what was there all along.

Emotional Investment Changes Your Judgment

Imagine buying a house. Would you purchase it after walking through the front door for five minutes? Probably not. You would inspect the foundation. Look at the roof. Check for water damage. Review the neighborhood. Ask difficult questions. Relationships deserve at least that much careful consideration. Yet emotionally, many people commit after only a handful of exciting conversations. Once we become emotionally invested, our brains begin protecting that investment.

Instead of asking, “Is this the right person?”

we begin asking, “How can I make this work?”

Those are completely different questions.

The Cost of Ignoring Red Flags

Red flags rarely appear as dramatic warning signs. Most begin as small moments. Perhaps they become irritated when they don’t get their way. Maybe they avoid accountability. Perhaps they speak disrespectfully about former partners. Maybe they struggle with honesty. Perhaps they become controlling in subtle ways. Someone who rushes into commitment often dismisses these concerns because the emotional reward feels greater than the potential risk. Unfortunately, ignored patterns rarely disappear. They usually become stronger. Dating is not primarily about convincing someone to stay. It is about discovering whether staying would be wise.

Love Needs Observation

Healthy relationships require curiosity. Observe how someone handles disappointment. Observe how they manage stress. Observe how they treat people who have nothing to offer them. Observe how they speak about family. Observe whether their words consistently match their actions. Character reveals itself over time. No conversation can replace experience. No promise can replace consistency. No chemistry can replace integrity.

Why Slow Relationships Often Last Longer

Research consistently suggests that relationships built gradually often develop stronger foundations because trust is earned rather than assumed (Stanley, Rhoades, & Markman, 2006). People sometimes fear moving slowly because they worry someone else will “take” the person they’re dating. Ironically, healthy people generally respect appropriate pacing. Individuals who pressure immediate commitment often reveal more about their own insecurity than about their love. Real intimacy grows. It cannot be rushed.

The Difference Between Commitment and Surrender

Healthy commitment says: “I’m choosing you because I know who you are.”

Unhealthy surrender says: “I’m choosing you because I hope you’ll become who I need.”

One is based on evidence. The other is based on emotion. One grows stronger over time. The other becomes increasingly fragile.

Questions Worth Asking Yourself

Before going “all in,” consider asking yourself:

  • What do I actually know about this person’s character?
  • Have I seen them during conflict?
  • How do they respond when they don’t get what they want?
  • Do their actions consistently match their words?
  • Am I attracted to who they are today or who I hope they’ll become?
  • If nothing about this person ever changed, would I still choose this relationship five years from now?

These questions may not feel romantic, but they are deeply loving—because they protect both people from building a relationship on unrealistic expectations.

A Better Way to Love

Moving slowly does not mean loving less. It means loving wisely. Healthy relationships are not races.

They are discoveries. Every shared experience reveals another layer of a person’s character. Trust is built 0through repeated consistency. Respect grows through mutual understanding. Love deepens through truth rather than fantasy.

Going “all in” is admirable when it follows genuine knowledge of another person. Going all in before you truly know someone is less an act of courage than a gamble. The strongest relationships are rarely built by those who rushed toward commitment. They are built by two people who allowed time to reveal character, chose honesty over fantasy, and discovered that lasting love is not found by moving faster—it is found by building a foundation strong enough to support a lifetime.

About the Author

John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW-S is a licensed clinical social worker, therapist, author, and educator with extensive experience helping individuals, couples, and families navigate relationship challenges, anxiety, trauma, and emotional well-being. Throughout his career, he has worked with people from diverse backgrounds, combining evidence-based psychological principles with practical, real-world applications that readers can immediately apply to their daily lives.

John’s writing bridges the gap between academic research and everyday experience, making complex psychological concepts understandable and useful. His work emphasizes emotional maturity, healthy communication, personal responsibility, and building relationships founded on trust, authenticity, and mutual respect. Whether writing about mental health, family dynamics, leadership, or personal growth, his goal is to provide readers with insights that encourage lasting change and healthier, more meaningful lives.

References

Fisher, H. (2004). Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love. Henry Holt.

Murray, S. L., Holmes, J. G., & Griffin, D. W. (1996). The benefits of positive illusions: Idealization and the construction of satisfaction in close relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 70(1), 79–98.

Stanley, S. M., Rhoades, G. K., & Markman, H. J. (2006). Sliding versus deciding: Inertia and the premarital cohabitation effect. Family Relations, 55(4), 499–509.

Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2015). The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work (Revised ed.). Harmony Books.

Grieving Someone Who Is Still Alive

When the Person Is Gone from Your Life but Still Walking Through Theirs

Article 4: Part of the Healing After Heartbreak Series

They Didn’t Die. They Just Left.

There is a unique kind of grief that few people talk about. It comes when someone you deeply loved is still alive, still breathing, still going to work, still laughing with friends, still posting pictures online—but they are no longer part of your life.

There was no funeral. No obituary. No gathering where people came together to honor the loss. Instead, there was a text message. A difficult conversation. A signed divorce decree. Or perhaps there was nothing at all except silence.

People around you may expect you to move on quickly because “they’re still alive.” But your heart doesn’t measure loss by whether someone is living. It measures loss by absence. It knows that the person who once shared your mornings, your dreams, your holidays, and your future is suddenly gone from your everyday life. That absence is real. And it deserves to be grieved.

A Different Kind of Grief

Most people understand the grief that follows death. Society has rituals for it. Friends send flowers. Employers offer bereavement leave. Neighbors bring meals. There is an understanding that healing will take time.

Relationship loss is different.

Often, people tell you to “get over it,” “find someone else,” or “everything happens for a reason.” While those words may be well-intentioned, they can unintentionally minimize a very real loss. Psychologist Pauline Boss introduced the concept of ambiguous loss, describing situations in which someone is physically present but psychologically or emotionally absent from our lives (Boss, 1999). Although her work often focused on families dealing with dementia, addiction, or missing loved ones, the concept also helps explain why the end of a significant relationship can feel so confusing. The person still exists, but the relationship you once depended on does not. Your heart struggles because there is no clear ending.

There is simply…absence.

You Aren’t Just Grieving a Person

When relationships end, we often believe we are grieving only the individual. In reality, we are grieving much more than that. You are grieving the future you imagined.

You are grieving the traditions you thought you would build together. The vacations you planned but never took. The anniversaries that will never be celebrated. The conversations you assumed you would have twenty years from now. Sometimes the deepest pain isn’t remembering what happened. It’s realizing what will never happen. That realization can feel overwhelming because it requires letting go of a future that once felt certain.

Imagine This

Imagine spending months planning the home of your dreams. You carefully choose the floor plan, the paint colors, and where the furniture will go. You picture birthdays around the dining room table, Christmas mornings in the living room, and quiet evenings on the back porch. Then, just before construction begins, the project is canceled. The house never exists. Yet you still grieve it.

Why?

Because your mind had already begun living there.

Relationships work the same way. Long before the future arrives, we emotionally move into it. We begin decorating it with hopes, dreams, and expectations. When the relationship ends, it isn’t just today’s happiness that disappears. It is the imagined future that disappears with it.

Why Certain Moments Hurt So Much

One of the most confusing parts of healing is that grief often arrives without warning. You may be doing well for several days, feeling hopeful and optimistic, when suddenly you hear your song playing in a restaurant. A familiar cologne passes by in a crowded store. Someone laughs exactly the way they did.

In an instant, your emotions rush back. Many people interpret these moments as setbacks. They aren’t.

Our brains naturally connect emotions to sights, sounds, smells, and places. Those memories become part of the brain’s filing system. When something familiar appears, it temporarily reopens that file. That doesn’t mean you are moving backward. It simply means your brain remembers. Over time, those emotional reactions usually become less intense, even though the memories remain.

A Story That May Feel Familiar

After twelve years of marriage, Robert found himself eating dinner alone for the first time in decades.

For weeks, he continued setting two plates on the table before catching himself. Every Friday evening he automatically drove toward the neighborhood where they used to meet friends for dinner. He wasn’t consciously trying to relive the past. His life had simply followed those routines for so many years that his mind continued them without asking permission.

One evening, instead of driving to the familiar restaurant, he stopped at a small local café he had never visited before. He brought a book, ordered something different, and sat quietly by the window. It wasn’t a magical moment. He still missed her. He still cried on the drive home. But something important happened that evening.

For the first time since the separation, he created a memory that belonged only to him. Healing often begins that way—not with dramatic breakthroughs, but with small moments that slowly become the foundation of a new life.

Therapist’s Note

One of the greatest misconceptions about grief is believing that healing means you stop loving someone. It doesn’t. You can appreciate what a relationship once meant while also accepting that it no longer belongs in your future. Acceptance is not betrayal. Acceptance is giving yourself permission to keep living.

A Healing Exercise: Saying Goodbye to the Future You Imagined

Tonight, find a quiet place with a journal or a blank sheet of paper. Write a letter—not to the person—but to the future you thought you were going to have. Describe the life you imagined together. Write about the dreams, the plans, the traditions, and the milestones that now feel lost. Don’t worry about grammar or saying the “right” thing. Simply let your heart speak honestly. When you finish, begin a second paragraph with these words:

“Although that future is gone, I still have the opportunity to create a meaningful life, and my next step is…”

Complete the sentence. Don’t try to write the rest of your life story. Just write the next step. Healing rarely requires us to know the entire journey. It simply asks us to take the next faithful step.

Final Thoughts

Perhaps the hardest part of grieving someone who is still alive is accepting that closure rarely arrives the way we hope it will. Sometimes there is no final conversation. No apology. No explanation that suddenly makes everything make sense. Sometimes healing begins when we stop waiting for someone else to provide closure and begin creating it ourselves. Your story did not end because this relationship did. There are still chapters left to write. New friendships to build. New places to explore. New laughter waiting to be discovered. And one day, when you look back, you may realize that while losing them changed your life, it did not define it. Your future is still waiting.

About the Author

John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW-S is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Executive Director of Southeast Kentucky Behavioral Health, LLC. With more than 25 years of experience in behavioral health, grief counseling, and relationship therapy, he has helped countless individuals navigate loss, rebuild their lives, and discover hope after heartbreak. His writing combines evidence-based psychology with compassionate, practical guidance to help readers heal one step at a time.

References

Boss, P. (1999). Ambiguous Loss: Learning to Live with Unresolved Grief. Harvard University Press.

Boss, P. (2006). Loss, Trauma, and Resilience: Therapeutic Work with Ambiguous Loss. W. W. Norton & Company.

Neimeyer, R. A. (2016). Techniques of Grief Therapy: Assessment and Intervention. Routledge.

Worden, J. W. (2018). Grief Counseling and Grief Therapy (5th ed.). Springer Publishing.

Series Reminder

Healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means carrying yesterday without letting it steal tomorrow.

When Your Heart Wants Them Back but Your Mind Knows Better:

Understanding the Battle Between Emotion and Logic After Heartbreak

Article Three: Part of the Healing After Heartbreak Series

Your Phone Lights Up

Your phone vibrates. For just a second, your heart races.

“Maybe it’s them.”

You reach for your phone almost before your mind has time to think. But it isn’t. It’s a weather alert. Or a friend. Or an advertisement. Your heart sinks just as quickly as it leaped. Then, almost immediately, another thought appears.

  • “Maybe I should text them.”
  • “Maybe enough time has passed.”
  • “Maybe they’ve changed.”

Your mind quietly reminds you why the relationship ended. Your heart answers, “Yes…but I still miss them.” If you’ve ever felt like your heart and your mind were arguing with each other, you’re not alone. This internal battle is one of the most common experiences after the end of a meaningful relationship.

Why Do I Feel This Way?

Many people believe that if they know a relationship was unhealthy, they shouldn’t miss the other person. Unfortunately, emotions don’t work that way. Love is more than a decision. It is also a collection of memories, routines, hopes, dreams, habits, and emotional bonds that were built over time.

When a relationship ends, those bonds do not disappear overnight. Your logical mind may understand that the relationship needed to end. Your emotional brain is still adjusting to the loss. That isn’t weakness. It’s part of being human.

Research has shown that romantic attachment shares many characteristics with other forms of attachment. When those attachments are broken, the brain often continues seeking closeness even after the relationship has ended (Fisher, Brown, Aron, Strong, & Mashek, 2010).

Your Brain Loves Familiar

Imagine you’ve driven the same road to work every morning for five years. One day, the road closes. Even though you know it is closed, you may still find yourself turning toward it out of habit. Relationships create similar emotional pathways. You became used to hearing their voice. Sharing good news. Sending funny memes. Talking before bed. Planning weekends. Your brain became familiar with that routine.

Now the routine is gone. The longing you feel is not always a sign that the relationship was right. Sometimes it is simply a sign that the relationship was familiar.

Missing Someone Doesn’t Always Mean You Should Go Back

This is one of the hardest truths to accept. You can deeply miss someone……and still know they were not good for you. Both things can be true. Consider these examples:

  • A person may miss someone who constantly criticized them.
  • Someone may long for an ex who repeatedly broke their trust.
  • A person may miss the companionship of a relationship even though they were unhappy most of the time.

Missing someone is evidence that you loved. It is not evidence that returning is the healthiest choice.

A Real-Life Example

Imagine a woman named Sarah who spent eight years with someone she loved deeply. Over time, the relationship became filled with broken promises, constant arguments, and emotional distance. When they finally separated, Sarah knew it was the right decision.

Yet every evening around six o’clock she reached for her phone. Not because anything had changed. Because for eight years, six o’clock was when they talked about their day. Her heart missed the routine. Her mind remembered the reality.

Healing required learning to create a new evening routine rather than returning to an unhealthy relationship simply because the old one felt familiar.

Love Can Leave an Echo

Think about walking through a canyon. You shout once. The sound continues long after you’ve stopped speaking. Relationships can leave emotional echoes. You may hear a song. Drive past a favorite restaurant. See someone wearing their favorite color. Smell a familiar perfume or cologne. Suddenly, your heart feels as if the breakup happened yesterday. That doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means memories are connected to your senses. Over time, those echoes become quieter.

Signs Your Heart and Mind Are Disagreeing

You might notice thoughts like these:

Your Heart Says:

  • “I miss them.”
  • “I just want one more conversation.”
  • “Maybe this time will be different.”
  • “I still love them.”

Your Mind Says:

  • “Remember why it ended.”
  • “You deserve consistency.”
  • “Love should not require constant suffering.”
  • “Missing someone isn’t the same as needing them.”

Learning to listen to both—and letting wisdom guide your decisions—is part of emotional maturity.

Therapist’s Note

One of the greatest acts of self-respect is refusing to confuse loneliness with compatibility. There are moments when your heart will ask you to go back simply because moving forward feels unfamiliar. Give your heart compassion. But let your values steer your life.

What You Can Do

The next time you feel the urge to reach out to someone you know is unhealthy for you, pause before acting. Ask yourself these questions:

  • Do I miss this person, or do I miss having someone?
  • Am I remembering the whole relationship or only the good moments?
  • If nothing about this person changed, would I still choose this relationship?
  • Am I looking for healing or temporary relief?

Then write your answers down. Sometimes seeing your thoughts on paper helps your emotions catch up with what your mind already knows.

Build a New Routine

One of the healthiest ways to quiet emotional longing is to replace old routines with new ones. Instead of checking your phone every evening:

  • Go for a walk.
  • Read for twenty minutes.
  • Call a friend.
  • Learn a new hobby.
  • Spend time in prayer or meditation.
  • Exercise.
  • Journal about your progress.

You are not simply filling time. You are teaching your brain that life continues.

Final Thoughts

There may come a day when you think about them and smile instead of cry. Not because they came back. But because you finally came back to yourself. Healing is not forgetting someone who mattered. Healing is remembering yourself enough to stop chasing what continues to hurt you. Your heart may take longer than your mind. That’s okay. Walk at the pace of healing, not the pace of loneliness.

About the Author

John S. Collier, MSW, LCSW-S is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Executive Director of Southeast Kentucky Behavioral Health, LLC. With more than 25 years of experience in behavioral health, trauma, grief, and relationship counseling, he has helped individuals understand the connection between emotions, thoughts, and healthy decision-making. His goal is to make psychological concepts practical, hopeful, and accessible for people navigating life’s most difficult seasons.

References

Fisher, H. E., Brown, L. L., Aron, A., Strong, G., & Mashek, D. (2010). Reward, addiction, and emotion regulation systems associated with rejection in love. Journal of Neurophysiology, 104(1), 51–60.

Mikulincer, M., & Shaver, P. R. (2016). Attachment in Adulthood: Structure, Dynamics, and Change (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.

Sbarra, D. A. (2015). Love, Loss, and the Space Between: Stop Avoiding Pain and Start Living Your Life. Hay House.

Series Reminder

Healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means carrying yesterday without letting it steal tomorrow.